Mmmm...coffee. Hot and creamy. Nothing beats sipping it in a little corner of peace. I have finally got just a few minutes to sit and munch away my pb&b and drink my coffee before another busy day unfolds. We are getting ready to go on a little trip, and although we will only be gone a few days, I started the process about a week ago. Packing things for all four of us, and things to bring to friends, running here and there getting things to amuse the kids with..going away takes a lot more effort these days! But the excitement of my child waiting to go reminds me of how I used to feel when I was her age..the anticipation was almost too much to handle! We are taking them to the zoo on Thursday, their first time, and little L can't wait to see the alpacas! Not the lions, not the tigers or bears..the alpaca. haha What a girl. Its because one of her adopted aunties sent her two toy alpacas from Peru and since then she loves them.
On another fun note, since I posted last, we have purchased our first home!! Talk about a huge change for us. We have always rented, and during our renting years, we have rented two homes and loved the autonomy of it. We were fortunate to have landlords who let us have fun with painting and flowers outside, but now for the first time, if we want to pull down a wall, we can! If we want a new bathroom, we can! If we want to do ANYTHING, within reason and budget....we can!! What a beautiful feeling. I have gone through every phase of this decision making process, the anxiety of making an offer..the anticipation waiting for them to accept (and never thinking they would)...the panic when they DID... the stress of paperwork and mortgage junk...And now, the excitement of starting renovations and making this cute little storey and a half our very own! This is actually quite the combo of fun..choosing the layout, the style, the fixtures, etc..and STRESS of doing this while caring for children fulltime and my husband, the actual Journeyman doing the work, working fulltime and stretching himself to the limit for the next few months! What a good man he is. I am so happy for him, though, because he spends all day every day planning and building other people's whatevers and now he can be his own boss and use his skills to benefit himself and his family. Of course, I have been constantly combing the internet and building supply stores for deals, and no doubt most of you have heard of Houzz.com...the Mecca of home design ideas!! Oh my word, I am obsessed. Of course, most of the houses/rooms shown are highly exorbitant and for the absolute wealthiest of the wealthy, but the colours and layouts are something to go on for the cheaper of us in the world. ;)
Because our new home is a cute, little home, we are going to go cottage style. Think beadboard in the bathroom/diningroom...pine furniture and colours inspired by a spa-like nature! Once I have learned how to embed photos onto my blog, I will post pictures of the fixtures we have chosen, and keep you up-to-date with our renovation process! Any of your input or suggestions are welcome!!
Well, I think mommy alone time has come to an end, I guess I should get on with this day and try to make myself look a little more presentable! I read an article the other day that showed how a mother's poor self-image can impact her daughter for the rest of her life...So I'm trying not to allow myself to be overly critical of what I dislike about myself in front of her, but at the same time I don't want my daughter to think that pajamas and dirty hair wrapped up in a bun are my highest standards for myself. haha. I better go shower. ;)
Wowee!! I can't believe it's been 5 whole months since I last wrote...with an apology that I hadn't written in months. I'm beginning to sound like a broken record! But, I guess this time I have a pretty good excuse. We welcomed our little son into our family on October 19, 2012, and we've been helping along in his first few months of life. It's hard to believe he'll be 3 months old in just a few days. It's amazing how much you forget between children all the little steps in their miraculous development and growth. How quickly they learn to focus their eyes to meet yours...and how quickly your heart melts with love for this little person. It's amazing how we were created to bond so deeply so fast with a being that only months before didn't even exist! And now, you can't even imagine them not being there.
Our little G. is quite the individual already. He seems to be much more serious than his sister, and very much attached to his mommy...which is wonderful and at the same time exhausting! However, I'm trying to take the advice of so many other seasoned mothers and remember that this time will quickly fly by and my little boy will be way to busy to snuggle with his mommy. His sister is already smitten with him, and I hope to goodness that the mutual fascination continues and that they grow up to love each other and be friends instead of fighting with each other all the time! And of course, we have our beloved husband and daddy home with us for a few months to help out and bond with G. and it's been absolutely wonderful! I try not to think about the day when he has to go back to work fulltime.
I think that with each new event in our lives, we change somewhat, in who we are, and what we want, and how we view the world. Now that I have my baby in my arms instead of my belly, I find myself asking 'me' what it is that I want to do next. I've always been the kind of person who started a new venture with all good intentions and enthusiasm, but somehow, somewhere along the way, my interest wanes, and I never completely finish what it is I started to do. For example, for ten years I studied music with the Royal Conservatory, with the aim of becoming a piano teacher. Well, I did teach a few people, and I did get my Grade 8 practical...but I didn't do my theory exam and so that means I didn't get a diploma. If I wanted one, I have to do Grade 8 all over again, and do my theory exam within 6 months. Then I tried living in another country with my hubby and making it our home longterm, but I got pregnant and never really got to power through the tough initial months of foreign living and have enough time to get comfortable. Then I was determined I wanted to make photography my pursuit, was all enthused for a few months, and then because I couldn't afford a better camera and I saw how great others were at it, I got discouraged. Of course, I could have used my time a little more wisely and studied techniques more to improve to the best my equipment offered. So. I can only conclude the problem lies within me...procrastination and lack of determination has been my worst enemy in holding me back from progress! And if I'm ever going to feel satisfied with where I am in my life, I have to get more discipline. I don't want to look back on my years and wonder what it is I've accomplished. And, although I know raising children is a very noble thing, and I feel privileged to have my beautiful babies, I don't think that defines me as a person exactly, but is just one part of my person.
So, although I don't really believe in the idea of resolutions for the new year, I want to make this year a year of change! A year where I get a grip, and make some good decisions! Otherwise, what exactly am I teaching my children? On that note, I hope all you who stumble upon my blog, or are still following my meager posts, are well, and enjoying what life brings your way!
I can understand completely if I have lost all of any followers I had for this poor neglected blog! I started this with high hopes, but it seemed to go the way of many many journals I have started and not finished over my lifetime. So sorry!! Since learning I'm pregnant, my mind seems to be filled with a million other things and I've kind of gotten discouraged with the whole photography thing. I had hoped to be taking a little correspondence course starting this winter, but that's definitely not going to be happening now. I've gone through the feelings of frustration, complacency, and just being stagnant, but I'm starting to snap out of it now I think. Hormones can do a real number on you, let me tell you. And combined with the terribly humid summer we've been having, my thoughts have been anything BUT creative!
Only 8 weeks left now, and things are starting to come together. We have the baby's new crib all set up in our room, and we're starting to collect things to prepare for our new little bundle. I guess,until recently, this has all seemed kind of surreal, we've been so busy, and with my precious ACTIVE little girl to keep me constantly guessing, I haven't focused much on the after the labour part yet! We still haven't nailed down names yet. My husband keeps reassuring me that no baby has ever been nameless. I just want to make sure that in my post-partum exhaustion it's not something ridiculous like "Blanket".
I'm sincerely looking forward to the crispness of fall, it's my absolute favorite time of the year, and especially being so very pregnant it will come as a huge relief to be able to breathe a little freer. I'm very fortunate that the one little secular job I do still have has air conditioning, so while I'm cleaning and preparing the house for the next guest I can enjoy a small respite from the draining heat outside. I'm also very grateful that I won't be still pregnant when the real cold starts, like the last time. I won't have to wear thigh highs that roll down my legs after 5 minutes of wear because I'm too cheap to buy maternity tights..now that's a real victory!
So, this blog has morphed into something a little different than I originally had purposed it for, but I think a creative outlet is something that we all need to have, no matter what its form. I have wonderfully talented friends and family who knit, crochet, make jewelry, paint, and quilt, and I've never been inclined or found myself with the natural talent for any of those things. But I've always enjoyed creative writing, both in school and just for myself, so even if this blog sees no eyes but my own, it may just be a good outlet for me. And later, when I'm less distracted, maybe it can be something more.
Until then, thanks for reading.
It feels early. But it's not really. I was just up too late. My darling other half is gone away for the weekend to help on a building project and I never sleep as well without him. A pillow beside me just doesn't snuggle back. And I always get a little skittish at night by myself, I don't know why, but I guess I still am a little scared of the dark!
I awoke to my little girl running into the kitchen to find us and then crying "Mommy, where ARE you??" when she didn't find me. Of course then comes the inevitable jump on my bed, and the day begins. As per usual, I stumble into the kitchen, put on the kettle, and pour her some milk. We have had so much rain lately, and I was delighted to get up to gorgeous sunshine absolutely pouring in the windows and bouncing happily off walls. Once I got my hot cuppa decaf (it's just not the same..) and crawled back into my bed (I'm turning into my mother), other than the sound of my girl happily playing in her room, a chorus of birdsong filters in my window. It takes me back to my childhood, funnily enough.
I remember Sunday mornings as a kid. I would be awakened to, first, soft birdsong. Then it would get louder and louder and, finally, the birds would be overshadowed by loud classical music booming from the speakers of my father's stereo in the livingroom. I remember cringing, covering my ears with my pillow and being SO annoyed to be awake. No, there wasn't a symphony outside. These birds weren't singing in my window, they were being broadcast over MPR's radio station airwaves, and my dad thought that was a nice way to wake me up. I'm smiling to myself thinking of all the creative ways he thought was a good way to wake me up over the years. At the time I wanted to murder him, of course, but I guess it prepared me for life. Not everything gets handed to you with kid gloves. Sometimes life just slaps you in the face and says, Here, deal with it. Get up.
But, this morning, even though I'm still in a fog, the sound of those birds is a comforting familiarity. They will always be out there, no matter what life is throwing at me, or what stage of life I'm dealing with. It's simple things like this that keep you sane. Nature remains constant, continues to do the same things it has done for thousands of years, even though drastic "progress" threatens it's existence.
So, little birdies, I'm awake. I'm ready for what the day has in store for me. And for everyone else, keep listening. Take time to enjoy the simple beauties of life and see what they have to offer. You might be surprised how much you missed what you never knew you needed.
Note: This photo taken by L'Homme Rioux.
It's been raining steady for two days now, and we may just float away or else start molding! I have to remind myself that this is the only way the brown patches on our lawn will turn green. And I'm tired of seeing dead looking spindly tree branches, they remind me too much of winter. So I'm thrilled to see little buds between the raindrops getting bigger with promise of, gasp, summer to come??
Where we are is a little behind the rest of the country as far as blooms go. In fact, the tulips and daffodils in my Gramma's garden have yet to pop. It's too bad spring flowers only last a couple of weeks. In my mind they're some of the prettiest of the year. My favorite? I guess it's not a plantable flower, it's the apple blossom. Mmmm, the sweet fragrant smell of perfumy flowers hanging heavy in the wet air, the sound of bees humming around to gather their tasty nectar. Needless to say, I have another couple of months before I smell that yet. But, I did venture out in the rain with my camera yesterday, on a mission to find a flower for my boss who tirelessly planted his bulbs last fall, and unfortunately lives too far away to enjoy their small window of life. Ta-da! One lone daffodil, and a few wild flowers. But, to me, any sign of life after winter is inspiration enough.
Vive le printemps! (now we just have to find a way to get rid of the blackflies...)
When I was a little girl, some of my earliest memories were of things we used to do as a big bunch of friends, young and old. Sometimes it was a cornboil/potluck with games outside and baseball in the hayfield. Other times it bonfires on the beach with roasted ooey gooey marshmallows. But one that always stood out was a brief memory of being lifted what seemed so high up, onto the back of a big yoked ox. A group of us were at Kings Landing, a historical village a few minutes outside of the town of Harvey, NB, and I was about 2 or 3 years old. Being so young I'm amazed I remembered that, but then, I've always been very fond of animals, so the fact that that's the only thing I remember about the day doesn't surprise me.
That same village of Kings Landing is still open to visitors every year, so children and grown-ups alike can experience what everyday life was like in the 1800s of New Brunswick. (The link to their website is here. ) My sister-in-law reminded me of their annual Sugar Bush weekends, where you can buy their special breakfast (proceeds going to a charity) highlighting of course, their homemade maple syrup! Then you can watch them pour the syrup on the snow and make candy out of it. So, we packed up our little kiddo and got there in time for what turned out to be a HUGE breakfast, and lots of fun afterward. Our little bean absolutely loved the animals, but the sheep was by far her favorite because it was so loud and ridiculous. She kept "MAA-ing" the entire time afterward. There's something so contagious about a child's hearty laughter!
A visit to this place will definitely show you that kids don't need a lot of flashing lights, crazy rides, or pumping music to have fun. Getting back to the basics with good food, fun animals, and the outdoors is really all you need.
Next time, we'll definitely bring friends!
After all that running and squealing and lots of crisp fresh air, this was the walk back...
She was asleep almost before we pulled onto the highway. And so ended another whirwind adventure...for the morning anyway! More adventures of the day to be added soon... A bientot!
Note: All pictures taken by LaFemmeRioux.
First of all, I have to say, To all who bother to check my blog for updates, a BIG apology for my almost month and a half absence. So many things have happened in that time, including discovering that I am pregnant!! This was a big surprise, but as I polled most of my seasoned mother friends, it's very rare that a child is actually planned. So, it's a relief that we're not totally irresponsible.
Needless to say, with this new revelation, most other things came to a screeching halt or at least drastic slowdown for a few weeks, because I felt dreadfully ill. I have to be thankful, though, I am not a person who throws up easily, even when pregnant, but I don't know what's worse, praying to the porcelain gods or wishing you could just to knock the feeling. :S And for one week my head felt like it was going to burst with terrible headaches, which left me in my bed many an hour a day. My kind doctor reassured me I was not going to die of an aneurism, but that yes, pregnancy hormones can also make your head throb. Thankfully, that particular symptom has passed, and I'm down to just occasional periods of feeling "ick" during the afternoon/evening. I'm 9 weeks along, so hopefully I only have another 3 of that to go like last time!
As I said, most other things have been put on the back burner for now, including my attempts at improving my photographic skills. Frankly, I just haven't felt that inspired, but I guess that might be normal given my circumstances. But, I'm determined to get back in the saddle soon, with a couple of possible portrait sessions coming up. I keep up-to-date with my favorite photography blogs, so they're helping me feel a little more motivated. And now that the sun is shining more often and the grass is peeping out, I just may venture outside to find some good nature shots too. In the meantime, before I get too adventurous, here are a few shots I took on a recent trip to our local Aquarium with our family and good friends.
Note:All photos taken by LaFemmeRioux.
